Wednesday, February 17, 2010

What more can I do?

I love being a stay at home mommy. For as long as I can remember it's all I ever wanted to be. I love being able to take care of Colton and not having to put him in daycare. When he was much younger, probably about 6-7 months, I went through a guilty faze where I thought I wasn't do anything to help him grow and develop. That feeling quickly passed when I realized that I was doing as much as I could with him at that young age. But, I have to admit, I am having that feeling again. Like I said, I love being a stay at home mommy and I wouldn't want it any other way but I can't help but think Colton might be missing out, not being in "school" each day. I feel like I'm doing a great job as a stay at home wife (if I do say so myself) I cook each night and I keep the house clean. I try to take care of as much as I can so Zak doesn't have to, but I still have that horrible feeling that I'm not doing all I could be doing with Colton. We are thinking about putting him in Mothers Day Out program in the Fall but we will only put him in for one day a week. Colton and I read and play every day. We work on learning words, animals noises, colors, cleaning up, etc but I never feel like it's enough. I have been a horrible slacker about taking Colton to the library and just getting him out of the house at all. So, I vow, starting next week, to go each and every possible Monday to the library and to schedule more play dates. We are still involved in MOPS but it only meets twice a month. This is my job now and since we can't afford to put Colton in school (MDO) 3 days a week it is my job to teach him everything I can. I want to involve him and to help him learn as much as he can. Sometimes it's hard to get motivated and it is so much more fun to just stay in our PJS and cuddle, play, and watch tv all day together but we just can't do that (and we don't). I won't let myself! I taught kindergarten for SIX years, you'd think this would come naturally, but I doesn't. 5 may sound young but what a 5 year old and a 20 month old can and should be learning are two totally different things, obviously.

So blogging friends and mommies... I need your help.
If you have ideas or websites you use with your kiddos I'd love to hear about them.

4 comments:

Jude's Mom said...

As a working mother, I have the same concerns but from a different perspective. I worry that my child isn't getting the kind of attention that he deserves. I tell myself that he could be learning so much more if I was with him everyday. Just remember to show Colton love and do the best you can and everything will be OK. :-)

bethany said...

Ah, the mom guilt. Yes, I am quite familiar with this feeling. I think it sounds like you are doing tons with him! I taught sixth grade for years and figured that I'd want to teach, teach, teach! at home, but I've come to the conclusion that when kids are tiny, they can be just that, kids. No need to push them or try and shove letters and such down their throats. They'll get all of that in school-I think the years before kindergarten are years for cuddling, playing blocks, and making messes. The library is great-most of them have really fun storytimes that are free (my favorite) and usually age appropriate, but I think that Colton is learning the one thing that he really needs to know before he goes to school and that is, that he is loved.
If you want to do some more arts/crafts type activities, this site is really great:
http://belladia.typepad.com/crafty_crow/
I used to write for this site and it has a lot of great ideas as well:
http://lessonplans.craftgossip.com/

Catherine said...

Thank you so much Robin and Beth...Your sweet kind words mean so much!!!!

I am Trish Marie said...

I always feel so guilty about what all I NOT doing. I always feel like maybe I should be doing more. I think we all feel that way no matter what we do. Or at least, the mothers who actually worry about these types of things!